Thursday, March 14, 2013

Through Mama's Eyes



Through Mama’s Eyes
By: Shelley Prince

As you began introducing the news of the birth of your child, you heard the constant tale of how a little one would change your life forever, but nothing prepared you for just how much such a small being would change every detail of your entire existence.

Having a child is all about the milestones—or the ‘firsts.’ These steps are with you for eternity. They are what kept you going every single day and they are what make life truly worth living.

You watched as your belly began to grow for the very first time. You watched in awe and without a single word to describe the image of your first unborn in black and white. Then you felt that very first flutter inside of you and questioned if it were real until you felt it another time. You will never forget the day as you lie there and hear the doctor shout “hear they come” and you hear the first sounds of your baby—yes, YOURS—the miracle YOU created. You count their tiny fingers and toes, and stare at their perfect, milky skin as your eyes are flooded with tears. You do this every day and it always feels like the first time. No one but a Mother knows this feeling and it is an honour to be able to do so. The weight gain, the stretch marks and scars, the pain of childbirth—this all means nothing anymore.

Times progresses and before you know it, you hear your little one say ‘Mama’ for their first time. It is not until now that being a Mother has felt like such a reality—someone calls you their MOM, you are responsible for another human being. This leaves you vulnerable, uncertain and emotional, but you know one thing for sure--you would do anything for this small person, without question.

No one can ever prepare you for the trials you face, the frustration you will feel, or the constant questions in your head. Some days you want to lie in bed all day from both the physical and emotional exhaustion, but you remind yourself that this is a GIFT. Not everyone is privileged enough to have these feelings and they would give up anything to be in your shoes, so you get up and carry on.

Before a child was born into this world, spontaneity was your best friend. Vacations, dates and pampering were the ‘norm,’ but now, you are lucky enough to have enough time to pee alone.

It is the days you are at whit’s end, your child senses your anger and comes up to hug you and say—“I Love You.” Words so powerful that they can turn the worst day into your best one. They reassure you that you are doing something right. She flashes you that little smile on her precious face that lights up your world, time and time again. Her laugh is incomparable. As a Mother, nothing ever gets old.

In track pants, your hubby’s over-sized hoodie and 3 day old hair, you go shopping. You see what society calls ‘the perfect Mom,’--that beautiful, patient woman, smiling from ear to ear with her ever so quiet son playing happily in the shopping cart. You see the Mother’s in movies, or the ones singing the loudest at the Mother Goose morning group. You second-guess your own capability as a Mother, what you are doing wrong and if you are ‘normal.’  Every Mother has their own way of parenting, but what should only matter is how your children see you—and to them, you are perfect.  It is called unconditional love.

Before becoming a Mother, you had dreams and goals for yourself, but they are nothing in comparison to what you hope for your child. Nothing can describe the feeling and sense of pride you possess when your daughter brings home her first school award or masters her first dance recital.

If I could tell my children what I want for them in life and for my daughter to carry on when she becomes a Mother is to LOVE. Love with everything you possibly have. Embrace each moment and capture it in your heart. Make memories and photograph them. Never forget how special moments are. Talk to your children, but most importantly, listen to them. They are wiser than you may ever know.  What may be a small issue to you, may be their entire world at that time. Acknowledge them, consider their words and act upon it.  Children will never remember the materials you bought them, but rather how you made them feel.

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